Dresses I Wish Weren't $1,120: Chloe's Striped Jersey Dress + "Relatively" Cheaper Options!

($1,120, Chloe, Net-a-porter.com)

ZOMG. Granted, the design and colors of striped jersey Chloe dress are awe-inspiring, um, but, WHY is it over a grand? It's made of fucking JERSEY, people! Look at all the other similarly cute jersey dresses you could purchase for far, far less!

($139, Betsey Johnson, Bluefly)

It's Bluefly, bitches!

($425, Diane von Furstenberg)

Not cheap, to be sure, but it's DVF. Worth every cent for this gorgeous wool frock.

($448, Badgley Mischka, Saks)

Next to Chloe, this Badgley Mischka jersey dress is "a steal!" And it's far more elegante.

($203, Mara Hoffman, Saks)

This doesn't totally apply, even though it is jersey, but I threw it in there because I forgot how much I love Mara Hoffman, and because it's stripey, and because I think it could actually look really cute with some peach-y pumps.

($88, JC de Castelbajac, Yoox.com)

Ok, certainly we're straying a bit too much into total-tennis territory here, but this adorable red-and-white-striped dress feels like a children's book come to life -- now, normally that would be really bad, but the not-too-obtuse scribbles make it whimsical and not too cloying.

NYC Sample Sale City!

Holy crap are there a TON of sample sales going on right about now.

Here they are, laydeez!

DIANE VON FURSTENBERG:
June 5 - 8
Tues, 9 - 6
Weds & Thurs, 10 - 7
Fri, 9 - 3
260 5th Ave, between 28 and 29

NIKKA NEW YORK
May 30 - June 2
Wed - Fri, 11 - 8
Sat, 11am - 6pm
214 W. 39th St, between 7th & 8th Aves., Suite #805
(212) 302-4284

TAHARI & ELIE TAHARI
May 31 - June 3 2007
Thurs, 2 - 7
Fri & Sat, 10 - 7
Sun, 11 - 7
72 Greene St., between Spring & Broome
(212) 239-7272

ELIJAH
May 30 & 31
Weds & Thurs, 10 - 6
The Globe Showroom
263 W. 38th St., between 7th and 8th Aves), 11th floor
(212) 221-6523
Cash and credit

LOTTA STENSON
Find Outlets
Thurs - Sun, 12 - 7
361 W. 17th Street, between 8th and 9th Aves.

And

229 Mott Street, between Prince and Spring


MARA HOFFMAN
May 31 - June 3
Thurs - Sat, 11 - 7
Sun, 12 - 6
70 Greene St., between Spring & Broome
(212) 505-3020

Um, part of me is VERY relieved I'm out of town this weekend! Now go forth and SAMPLE!

I Do... Want These Dresses

A few of you have been up in arms and legs about what to wear to upcoming weddings. Well, fear not, Binge-oids. I've been hording some absolutely gorgeous frocks, some affordable, and, again, many definitely not! Here's the first out of a series of two. This batch: the fancier ones:



($750, 3.1 By Phillip Lim, Bigdropnyc.com)
Completely beautiful, completely out of my price range. I'm consoled though, by the fact that I don't really like the bottom hem.



($629, Sofira, CoutureCandy.com)
I absolutely love this, and I am consoled by nothing. Boooo.



($360, Kay Unger, Saks)
Cuter than a flannel pillowcase with an all-over candycane print, and then you open up the pillowcase and look inside and it's filled with fuzzy, fluffy wide-eyed kittens mewing sweetly.



($340, Mara Hoffman, Shopfrock.com)
Would look gorgeous with some gold sandals wif heels.



($277, Calvin Klein, Saks)
Muy elegante. You'll look less trashy when you get wasted before the reception if you're wearing this deceptively elegant dress. (Hey, it's called a cocktail dress and a cocktail hour for a REASON!)



($136, Betsey Johnson, Overstock)
Okay, a few times this week, I came DANGEROUSLY close to almost ordering this to wear to a wedding in June. The couple is super cool and super not-stuffy and non-traditional, so this would be perfect. BUT when I showed it to a different friend, also a non stuffy person, she asked if, in all seriousness, I was having an early mid-life crisis. I'm not even 30, for Pete Wentz's sake! Anyway, if there's ANYONE who could pull off wearing this to a wedding, I think it's ME! I also think I might order it JUST to SPITE her! Because I'm just that sorta person!



($128, Betsy & Adam, Saks)
Since I've got a lotta red tones in my skin, I almost never wear red. But, if you can pull it off, this is totally adorbs.



($64, Max & Cleo, Overstock)
I usually don't LOOOOVE dots, but these look really subtle, and I like the cut and color -- sorta '40s. You might have to have zero curves to wear this, but if that's you, yay! Get it!


Byeee!

Wants Du Jour

Stuff I want today:

($340, Mara Hoffman, Shopfrock.com)
Mara Hoffman wins again.



($160, Development, RougeGirl.com)
Never in a million dark days would this ever work on me, but it's gorgeous. I want it for YOU.



($61, Vince Camuto, Piperlime)
I'm not always a big fan of whip-stitching, but the bow evens out the "Westerny" look, which I usually deplore. I LOVE the color. And the price! Weeee!

Fantastic Frocks & a Few Awesome Office Dresses

Oh alliteration! You are a FOUL temptress. Wow. So far NOTHING I've said has made any sense whatsoever. But you know what DOES make sense? These completely rad dresses, listed in descending order of affordability.

Ok. Let's begin.


($325, 3.1 Phillip Lim, standardstyle.com)
K so TECHnically it's a jumpsuit and not a dress, and DEFINITELY I wouldn't wear this to work since I do not work at Tribeca coke bar. But it certainly does rule, that I can agree with myself about.

($187, Nieves Lavi, shopbop.com)
Profoundly elegant. Yes, I just said that. I meant it too.


($177, Abaete, Bluefly)
I love this dress so much that if I were little and begging my mom for it I'd be like "PLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAASE! I'LL BE SO GOOD! I'LL WEAR IT EVERY DAY AND TAKE SUCH GOOD CARE OF IT! PLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEESE!" She probably still would've said no, but I most definitely would've put on a good show. (Coincidentally, this is also why I now have a shopping problem as an adult! Thanks, Ma!)


($175, Phoebe Couture, NeimanMarcus.com)
Amazing. Best little black dress ever.


($158, Custo Barcelona, eDressme.com)
This dress is basically a miracle. That's all I have to say.


($128, MaxStudio.com)
This is sorta good for work. Especially if you work somewhere boring.


($115.99, Mara Hoffman, shopintuition.com)
Huzzah, Mara Hoffman!


($112.49, Abaete, bluefly)
There has NEVER been a better time to be either a size 6 or 8.


($63.99, Molly, Overstock.com)
I love this dress either despite or because it reminds me of a Barbie cocktail dress I once had.


($63.05, Young Fabulous & Broke, Amazon.com)
Young, Fabulous & Broke = three things I can relate to at pretty much all times. If you can get past this absolutely wretched "model," this makes a decent work dress. Especially if you work someplace slutty!


($57, Citiknits, QVC.com)
Um, yes, you read that correctly. QVC. Frell. I mean it. I LOVE this delish jersey dress. Enough to shop at QVC? Remains to be seen, but I've definitely done worse.

And finally...


($50, eDressme.com)
In Medium only. Yay! I've never been so happy to be average!

... And... scene.

How Do You Solve a Problem Like Mara?

Okay. Normally I totes just SWOOOOOON over Mara Hoffman's classic yet contemporary girlie but not too girlie dresses in vintage wallpapery patterns -- as Shiny Squirrel so succinctly blogged. BUT.

What. The. Frock is up with this????


Seriously!?? Does this not totes resemble that creepy Elvira/ Morts-ticia Addams ho-ey burial sheath that Angelina wore to the 2000 Oscars when she sucked face with her brother and tried to Jurassic Park-style consume him with her big, scary velociraptor
mouth?
(Ew. They totes made out later that nite!)

Next...

($74, planetfunk.com)
This is cute.

($158, Joe's Jeans, couturecandy.com)
This is definitely not. Ew. Can't you just see Cameron Diaz wearing these with some off-the-shoulder black top to the Kids Choice Awards or whatever and posing on the red carpet with a "Tee hee! I'm kooky!" look with her mouth way open? I know I can.