(SCAW) Shitty Craiglist Ad of the Week

Hi. Please give me $200 of your hard-earned cash so I can buy a nice NEW pair of jeans. In return, I will give you a pair of jeans that even a homeless shelter would probably reject.



Serious inquiries ONLY!

For Sale By Boner

Some choice eBay and Craigslist finds for your late afternoon.

+ There's just so much that's sad about this post, I don't even know where to start.
+ This may be even sadder.
+ Cute '50s skirt, but does the fact that you wore it to a New Order show make me want to buy it? Uh, no.
+ I love this dude's assertion and assumption that this very jacket is probably "the best piece of vintage clothing on the market today from that era." Easy, killer!
+ This leopard-print dress is, indeed, extremely cute. I have nothing obnoxious to say about it.

Hoodies, Hoodrats and Hos

Dudes, here's something cute for you:

($85.71, Crooks & Castles, caliroots.com)
I dig the chain print and the colors.

Speaking of hos:

($49.99, Fornarina, Piperlime.com)
Are these cute, or are they too Tara Reid?

Must-Have Monday

How cute is this vintage dress?

($17, Earth Angel, Vintageamore.com)
Someone buy it so I can live vicariously through you, okay?

Also, what's up with the lack of comments? I sorta feel like Christina Slater in the beginning of "Pump Up the Volume," before his show got really popular and kids started offering themselves. Holla at a Jew, k?


Talk hard!

Cute Coats + More Darling Dresses, Dude

Alliteration is kicking my ass these days, nomesayin? Anyway, here are some totally presh dresses and great coats and jackets.


($262.50, Catherine Malandrino, Shopbop.com)
This Catherine Malandrino stars dress is blowing my mind. I freaking love it. And it looked better on Carmen Electra, believe it or not, with all her curves and what not. Not loving it with the black hose, but whatevs. I would rock it and rock it right. They've also got it here, but HELLO! I just saved you over $100 bucks.


($88, Catherine Malandrino, Revolveclothing.com)
I also LOVE this Catherine Malandrino dress, but it's solllld out. Lame. See if you can find it elsewhere, though. I would, but I'm busy.


($47.20, Beau Bois, Shopblushboutique.com)
This gorgeous '20s dress is not only beautiful, but that price is possibly even more gorgeous. A warning: these type of dresses often look better on Mischa Barton bodies. I learned that the hard way. But you don't have to take my word for it.


($128.70 USD, French Connection, asos.com)
I LOOOOVE this beauteous butterfly dress, and due to my recent conversion to the brown side (um, ew. That sounded really bad), I even love this version probably even more than the white one.


($76.99, To the Max by BCBG, okto.com)
I'm not going to lie: this site freaks me out a little bit, but I love this coat, and it was on Overstock, but it sold out. Anyway, I like the British-esque buttoned-up-yness. Very Sherlock Holmes-like.


($74.99, Via Spiga, okto.com)
This looks warm and snuggly but not too super puffy. But again, what's up with this site? Ok to WHAT? Also, they have other sizes but they do that stupid thing where they list them separately. Boo.

Finally, much to my dismay, I can't grab this photo. Boo again. Anyway, check out this rad vintage grey jacket with fur trim. It's on the new Goodwill site and there's only two days left as of now.

No, I'm not all about fur, but look, it died A LONG time ago, okay? And the jacket is OLD. No one's going to go out and shoot another rabbit just because you bought this, ok? Well, ok, more rabbits are probably going to die, but it won't be your fault.

More about this site: it's the new Goodwill (as in the thrift store) auction site. It's sorta like eBay but the only sellers are Goodwills throughout the U.S. But you bid like eBay. I think it's a great idea -- more money going to charity. And for vintage lovers like myself in New York, where "thrift" t-shirts start at like $50, I'm like YAY! More access to vintage.

Here's some more sweet stuff I found:
+ Dooney & Burke bag
+ Cowboy boots, size 7
+ Etra navy blue leather vintage purse
+ Red patent leather (VERY in for spring!) "Miss America" purse
+ Awesome fuck-me red vintage heels and matching bag
+ Hot fuck-me black vintage bow slide heels
+ Rad vintage purple rhinestone necklace
+ Amazing off-white leather vintage boots
+ Sweet blue vintage cowboy boots
+ Vintage Persian lamb jacket with mink collar -- again, sorry
+ Insanely rad size 6.5 vintage brocade heels
+ Vintage black snakeskin bag


Wow. Divulging that much up-for-grabs vintage awesomeness is basically a total shopping mitzvah. Now pay it forward, hos!

Fantastic Frocks & a Few Awesome Office Dresses

Oh alliteration! You are a FOUL temptress. Wow. So far NOTHING I've said has made any sense whatsoever. But you know what DOES make sense? These completely rad dresses, listed in descending order of affordability.

Ok. Let's begin.


($325, 3.1 Phillip Lim, standardstyle.com)
K so TECHnically it's a jumpsuit and not a dress, and DEFINITELY I wouldn't wear this to work since I do not work at Tribeca coke bar. But it certainly does rule, that I can agree with myself about.

($187, Nieves Lavi, shopbop.com)
Profoundly elegant. Yes, I just said that. I meant it too.


($177, Abaete, Bluefly)
I love this dress so much that if I were little and begging my mom for it I'd be like "PLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAASE! I'LL BE SO GOOD! I'LL WEAR IT EVERY DAY AND TAKE SUCH GOOD CARE OF IT! PLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEESE!" She probably still would've said no, but I most definitely would've put on a good show. (Coincidentally, this is also why I now have a shopping problem as an adult! Thanks, Ma!)


($175, Phoebe Couture, NeimanMarcus.com)
Amazing. Best little black dress ever.


($158, Custo Barcelona, eDressme.com)
This dress is basically a miracle. That's all I have to say.


($128, MaxStudio.com)
This is sorta good for work. Especially if you work somewhere boring.


($115.99, Mara Hoffman, shopintuition.com)
Huzzah, Mara Hoffman!


($112.49, Abaete, bluefly)
There has NEVER been a better time to be either a size 6 or 8.


($63.99, Molly, Overstock.com)
I love this dress either despite or because it reminds me of a Barbie cocktail dress I once had.


($63.05, Young Fabulous & Broke, Amazon.com)
Young, Fabulous & Broke = three things I can relate to at pretty much all times. If you can get past this absolutely wretched "model," this makes a decent work dress. Especially if you work someplace slutty!


($57, Citiknits, QVC.com)
Um, yes, you read that correctly. QVC. Frell. I mean it. I LOVE this delish jersey dress. Enough to shop at QVC? Remains to be seen, but I've definitely done worse.

And finally...


($50, eDressme.com)
In Medium only. Yay! I've never been so happy to be average!

... And... scene.

Secret Sale

Ain't a secret anymore!
SmartBargains.com is having a "secret" sale through tomorrow, 1/22/2007.
Get to it!

THIS sweet Marc Jacobs dress could be yours for the (relatively) low, low price of just $159.

More Cute Shoes

Perhaps because I was once a Girl Scout, I always plan ahead. So that means I'm already thinking about spring/ summer shoes (which can also means I'm open to wearing summer shoes now -- i.e. with tights -- since winterizing is all the rage these days).

Basically, unless I'm running out to a bodega, and sometimes even then, I HATE flipflops. HATE them. I also don't like platform wedges or espadrilles because I fear my ankle will pronate (fancy word for "buckle") and I'll crack my foot off. And ballet flats are totes ok, but I want an alternative. And if it's not too much to ask, since I'm already on a mission for cute footwear for the spring, I'd like something for NOW, something that isn't boots, because I'm wearing the living hell out of mine. Ok. so, I needed cute slip-on type shoes that I can wear now and in the coming months, particularly when it's not 3 degrees out.

At first I thought seriously about these. They're cute, affordable, and I can even wear them now. But, they're satin, which a.) I don't like, and b.) they'd be ruined even at the mere threat of moisture. So they're out.

($58.98, Tribeca, LoveMyShoes.com)

Next I found these. They're super cute, and I appreciate that extra little lift of height -- at 5.1" I could definitely use it. And the fact that they aren't 5" of platform is also much appreciated.

($15.99, Qupid, Cutesyshoes.com)
I didn't buy 'em, but um, I probably will.

I like the very ledo-deckness of these:

($89.00, BCBC, Macys.com)
They're sorta Shelley Winters in "The Poseidon Adventure" before she dies, of course.

Then I happened upon these on eBay:

And guess who WON! ME! Usually I'm VERY anti brown shoes, but I'm getting older and I think it's time to face my fears. And guess what... they're even more adorable in person, especially on. .. ME!

Since I'm still thinking about ballet flats, I found these, but then I stopped smoking crack and realized that they totally suck.

($39, TeeTee, LoveMyShoes.com)

Then I found these which I also bought. YAY!

($34, Prima Donna, Winknyc.com)

And, because I can't be content to buy just two pairs of shoes, and because I got SUCH GREAT DEALS (the ebay ones were less than $20), I decided to pick, these up too. Not in black. For someone who feared brown shoes since I grew out of my Buster Browns, I think I'm being pretty fearless, no? I think these could be totally cute with jeans.

($42.99, Dr. Scholl's, Overstock.com)
I also searched for "overstock coupons" online and got free shipping. Yay, me!

Since I'm already on a preppy shoes kick, these are also quite cute and would be great for summer, no?

($70, Steve Madden, piperlime.com)

Ok, here's what else I found on my online journey:


MORE GREY BOOTS, PLEASE!

($69 USD, Poste Mistress, Office.co.uk)
Mmm! Delicious grey suede!

EVEN MORE GREY BOOTS!

($110, Report, Macys.com)

These could actually be pretty cool, especially since I'm seeing lotsa mod/sporto stuff for the spring:

($18.99, Delicious, CutesyShoes.com)

Yay! Lovely:

($51.60, Seychelles, Winknyc.com)
But only in limited sizes = boo.

For some reason, I like these:

($62, BC, lafemmeboutique.com)
But I've been around long enough to know that they might be better in theory than practice. Sigh.

Same goes for these:

($249, Kenneth Cole, jmarco.com)
Now, I think they're cool, but I got a "you're out of your goddamned mind" from ONE CERTAIN BLOGGER and "I feel like I don't even know you" from a NOW-ENEMY when I shared my sentiments. I like 'em, but what do I know? I'm just your motha! Hmph!

These could be super cheap looking in real life, but for 10 bucks, who cares?

($9.99, Wild Diva -- horbs name, I know -- CutesyShoes.com)
Woah. Are you still reading this? You're the best!

Do I need these? No. Do I like 'em? Of course.

($85, Adidas, Urbanoutfitters.com)

These shoes rule:

($189.99, Bettye Muller, Amazon)

These shoes suck:

($454 USD - !!!! - Acne Jeans, Brownsfashions.com)
So awful, but you just KNOW you're gonna see Sienna or Jessica Simpson in them in like a week. Still, it's NO excuse.

And, finally, speaking of footwear sin, I leave you with these:

($19.75, Chinese Laundry, plasticlandclothing.com)

Ok, I'm finally done. Bon voyage!

Color Me Bad

PLEASE. NO. DEAR GOD.

Urban Outfitters totally loses its marbles. Horbs.

These skinny jeans, however, are super cute.
($119, J Brand, Girlshop)

That's it for now. Still recovering from the optical assault of seeing those hein Skittles-colored skinny jeans in my inbox.

Spring Forecasting

Ok. Here's a bunch of stuff I want for spring or pretty much any other season.

Mike and Chris
Ideally, I think someone should buy me this jacket:

($825, RonHerman)

Now the good thing about this jacket: it's awesome. The bad thing: it literally costs as much as my rent. But, I bet it's warm enough to keep me toasty if I needed to sleep outside my apartment for a month!

Apparently Old Navy knocked it off, and while it's sold out (boo!) you can get it on ebay if you're quick-fingered enough. Yay!

Here's another rad Mike and Chris jacket, in a slightly less threatening camel color:

($660, Pinkmascara.com)

And Earnest Sewn has a cheaper, albeit wool, version of THAT jacket:

($248, activeendeavors.com)

Some more cute Mike and Chris stuff that's slighty more in the realistic realm of my beer pockets:
($104, ShopRobertson.com)
You are totally the smartest girl in your English class in this piece.


($87, Girlshop.com)
Totally the smartest girl in your boring weekly meeting... Sorta reminds me of Karen O., except this isn't really annoying and weird for the sake of being weird. Oh damn... WAIT! They totally NAMECHECKED her in the description! Copy cats. I hate when people cop my genius!

Fantasy Dress

($368, Cynthie Steffe, girlshop.com)
I don't care if it's not very spring-y. It's pretty much awesome. The booby part is VERY Janet 1814/ Madonna, circa her "Express Yourself"/ Breathless Mahoney era.

Rad Shoes, On Sale

($85, oh Deer! -- cute name! -- girlshop.com)
DSS -- Definitely Spring Shoes

Awesome, Yet Way More Expensive Shoes

($341, Eileen Shields, girlshop.com)
Sweet, but I could totally see finding a totes similar pair for more cheapers, you know?

Lame Shirt With Fun Packaging

($25, DOE, 80spurple.com)
Not for all of the free "orange drink" in the world would I ever wear McDonald's apparel, but I DO like the fact that it comes in a Happy Meal box. That's just plain Amurrican fun:



Here's a Token Bathing Suit

($125, Missoni, RonHerman.com)
Loves. Totes great price too. And the stringiness means NONE of that horbs restrictive elastic band situation. Not that I know what that's like or anything. Just heard from other people. Poor dearies!

Cool Shirts

($30, Uzi, Flashlighttag.com)
Awesome.


($32, Opening Ceremony, OogaBoogaStore.com)
Also awesome.

Less Than a Latte
($3, Vegas & Mia, ShopRobertsonLA.com)
Yay! Cheap accessories are awesome in ANY season. K, byeeee!