Thursday, June 22, 2006

Barf Bags

As promised, we here at Fashion Binge are dedicated to both the binge and the purge portions of our style sickness. Here are a few bags that make me want to hurl (my blog partner, however, may actually like one or two of them; such is the nature of her wildly unpredictable taste).



Yeah, I know. What do you really expect from Wal-Mart? This is sort of just subtly horbz. I'm just getting warmed up, don't you worry. But I did really like how I misread the description of this bag as being a good option to spruce up "tribal pants." They meant prints. But still: I bet they totally have tribal pants at Wal-Mart.



Here's a better one. This denim monstrosity is exactly the kind of thing you think of when you think of Wal-Mart, and obese Middle American moms. I personally am of the belief that no one should carry any denim bag, ever. EVER. I defy anyone to find me a denim bag I'd deem worthy. The chain, by the way, is getting in on the designer-collabo game, hooking up with one Marc Eisen, who I have never heard of and whose Wal-Mart submissions I predict will be just as sucky as Tara Jarmon's for Target.



Which, this? Seriously? Ugh. But Wal-Mart,as I was saying, is part of a trend. If you clicked the above link, you know that Nine West will soon also be coming out with shoes and accessories from Sophia Kokosalaki, who has a great name, and Thakoon, who was a very nice, very polite fashion assistant at Harper's Bazaar when I worked there a few years ago (notice me establishing my fashion cred, such as it is). Go Thakoon.



Dooney & Bourke makes so many hideous bags, it's hard to choose just one. from the pukey pink pattern to the proud logo medallion thing to the swingy heart charm, this little barrel bag could not be more juvenile. And yet does a 5-year-old pay $185 for their bags? I suppose in certain quarters they do. These bags are a travesty, pure and simple.

All this puking is making me tired. I offer the following abortions of style without comment:





I'm actually starting to come around on that last one....